The Bride Wore Green
by Dark Rabbit
Summary: The world needs more Doom and Loki stories. This one features a wedding, to which our two anti-heroes have invited all their friends and relatives (all two of them). Then The Avengers and The Fantastic Four come along too, to see what they're up to.
1. Steve and his New Team

"We'll have an old-fashioned wedding,  
Blessed in the good old-fashioned way.  
I'll vow to love you forever,  
You'll vow to love and honor and obey.  
Somewhere in some little chapel,  
Someday when orange blossoms bloom,  
We'll have an old-fashioned wedding,  
A simple wedding for an old-fashioned bride and groom ."  
– Irving Berlin

**_The Avengers_, and _Thor_, and all situations and characters thereof, belong strictly and solely to Marvel Comics. This is a fan-work, meant for enjoyment only, and not for any material profit.**

Back in the day, there used to be these magazine ads with before and after pictures in them. There'd be the girl whose dry, chapped hands were keeping her from getting any fellows, or the guy with halitosis who couldn't get his boss to give him the time of the day. Then they'd use whatever it was the ad was selling, and suddenly their lives would turn around. Everything would be happy for them, and they'd get just what they always wanted. Steve's life in the Twenty-First Century, is kind of like one of those ads.

First he wakes up in the SHIELD-lab. He discovers that even though he's hugely interesting to the US Government, that doesn't actually translate out to their bothering to find him a job to do, or a decent income, or even a place to stay outside of the lab. Director Fury's the one that finds him an apartment, and it's one tiny room with an icebox and one of the strange high-tech ovens run by microwaves that everybody uses here. There's still nothing for Steve to do though, except get examined and questioned (debriefed they call it), all day every day, and then spend his off-hours working out in the gym at the local Y (Fury pays his membership). Fury says he's got a plan for him, but he waits and he waits, and nothing seems to materialize. He's starting to wonder if he ought to have agreed to the super-soldier serum in the first place. Okay so maybe he was a 98-pound weakling, back home in Brooklyn, but there were essential jobs he could have done. He could have helped out with the war effort some other way.

Then, bam! Loki turns up, and suddenly he's right in the middle of the job Fury kept promising: Tony Stark can't take an order to save his life, and Bruce Banner _can_, but he doesn't _want_ to... Natasha Romanoff looks kind of like the Ingrid Bergman character in _Casablanca_, only she can fight better than anyone Steve's ever seen. Fury's carrying water for some more faceless higher-up bureaucrats, the kind that thought it was okay for the Army to give Steve superpowers, and then keep him in a warehouse like some kind of a lab specimen, but he's not totally a bad guy, and he knows how to get a team motivated.

One minute he's stopping a little tin-pot would-be Hitler before he can start incinerating random passers-by in Stuttgart. The next minute (almost), the Great Dictator's in cuffs like he should be, and his brother's taking him back to face justice in his own country ...world ...Or planet maybe, Steve's not really sure just exactly what Asgard is. He's gone anyway, and Steve's going back to his studio apartment to see if his milk's still good.

Then Tony Stark pops up: "So I've got this idea." He _never_ stands still. It's one of the really annoying things about him. One of the many. He's hopping around the room. One minute he's over by Steve's microwave, the next minute he's by the window fiddling with the venetian blinds. Then he's over by the bookshelf. "_Farewell to Arms_? This any good?"

"I liked _The Sun Also Rises_ better. – You were talking about a plan?"

Tony puts down the book. He turns, giving Steve all his attention (finally). "Short version: I'm re-purposing Stark Tower for Avengers' use. If we're going to be a permanent team, we need a headquarters. A Hall of Justice, if you see what I mean. - We probably need a mascot as well, I'm thinking some kind of talking space monkey would be good, but one thing at a time..."

When he finally gets to it, it turns out Tony's _idea_ is that Steve should stay at the Tower in Manhattan: "You, and Bruce if he wants a place," he says. "Well, all of us, but Clint and Natasha are out of the country, so I haven't been able to ask them yet. There's plenty of room. You can each have your own floor, and you can set it up the way you want. – Don't say no before you think about it, Cap. This is seriously a great idea."

Actually, it seriously is. The Tower's _big_. There's room for all of them to have their own floor, and some more space in case they decide to add new Avengers. There's space for Tony and Bruce to work on their research, and for Steve to set up a state-of-the-art gym for his workouts. Tony's good about respecting their personal space too, way better than you'd think he would be. Their floors are their floors, and no one comes in unless they're invited. Upstairs the penthouse is there for when they want to other Avengers around.

Steve finds that once he's gotten to know them, he actually does want them around most of the time. He likes Bruce's serious attitude and Natasha's sense of responsibility. He likes Clint's dedication to perfecting his skills. - He even likes Tony, who's hiding a real conscience and a warm heart, under that shallow-playboy attitude of his. Thor, he hasn't seen since they defeated the Chitauri. He took his brother home in handcuffs and a huge metal gag. He said he'd come back if there was any more trouble.

So far things have been pretty quiet, though. There's been trouble, but it's been _little_ trouble, something one of them, or two maybe, could handle in an afternoon. Steve's been out once on SHIELD business, tangling with a character called Abomination, who's like Bruce's Hyde-side, only with no conscience. He's heard about some other guys. Red Skull's still around apparently, and there's some guy named Green Goblin who's supposed to be a nasty piece of work. Nothing's been seen of them though, or of much of anybody else. Steve's been spending his time working out, listening to Bruce and Tony talk about their research (of which he understands about one word in every hundred), sketching whoever will sit still for him. He's got a series of paintings going: He did one from every window of the penthouse. Then he started again doing one of the view from every window _in wintertime_. He's starting to think he'll be ready to start again with the springtime set before there's serious trouble, and that's when Thor shows up again.

Steve comes upstairs after his shower to start breakfast. Tony's up already. "Can't talk. Coding," he says from behind his computer screen. "Bring me some coffee when you've got it made, okay?"

Because he doesn't have anything better to do with his time than bring everyone coffee, right. It's just Tony's way though, and Steve tries to ignore it. He loads the Folgers into the drip machine and starts it going. "What time did you get to sleep last night?"

"Didn't. Sleep is for pussies." – Steve bites his tongue instead of protesting the language. – "UN wants to use my power-cell. Still need a couple of things before the demo at ten."

Cheery bubbling sounds are the coffee getting ready on the counter. Steve sniffs the aroma, then pulls a pack of bacon out of the fridge (speaking of good aromas). He fires up the burner under the frying pan.

He's about halfway through his breakfast when Thor shows up: Tony's left his computer and he's over by the table mooching food. "I hate you." He grabs a slice of bacon off Steve's plate. "Singlehandedly you're ruining my cholesterol-count." Puppy-dog eyes watch as Steve slices into his second over-easy fried egg and sops the yolk with buttered toast.

Steve glares. "You made me promise I wouldn't cook breakfast for you any more."

"I lied."

"Unlike you, I keep my word."

"Fine then, you selfish bastard, I'll cook my own."

When he hears the first crack of thunder, Steve thinks it's Tony digging in the cupboard for _his_ pan, because God forbid he should just use the cast iron one Steve's got. It's not until the second boom that he identifies the source of the noise. Maybe that's because by then, the source is standing there in the middle of the kitchen.

"Well met, my friends." Thor looks harried. Circles under his eyes speak of lack of sleep, and his hair is standing up in about a hundred and one directions. As Steve watches, he combs his hands through it again, disorganizing it even further. "Had I my wish, we would be meeting under better circumstances."

"Yes, but what _are_ the circumstances, Point Break?" Tony pours himself some coffee. At a look from Thor, he pours him a cup too. Then he brings a third cup to Steve at the table. "What are we looking at here?" He motions his hand with the coffee cup in it. "Alien invasion? Another attack by your crazy brother?"

Thor winces at the mention of Loki. "Indeed I wish the problem were so simple, Friend Tony." He fumbles, bringing something out of whatever Asgardians have that passes for their pockets. "I need your help with this."

He tosses whatever it was onto the table, where it unfolds into an envelope of creamy, expensive-looking paper. On the back, what remains of of a fancy wax-seal shows an imprint of the letter "D".

Steve looks at it uncomprehending. "Somebody sent you an invitation."

"My brother." Thor gestures toward the envelope. "Pray look, my friends. I fear I cannot proceed with this problem without your help."

It's Steve who slides the card out of the envelope. Stiff parchment-paper, with the uneven surface on the back that shows it's real engraving. "The free people of Latveria," it says, "cordially invite you to attend the upcoming nuptials of our benevolent ruler Dr. Doom, and Loki of Asgard. In lieu of gifts, the bride/groom and groom request that you make donations in their name to the Brotherhood of Evil Mutants."

"Jesus Christ!" Steve barely mouths the words.

"Look there." Tony nudges him and points at the note in green pen at the bottom.

"Do say you'll come, brother. This promises to be quite entertaining."


	2. Gifted with a Demigod

"Probability is that he will not accept the invitation."

Loki sits – He _reclines_, rather. – on the comfortable sofa Doom has installed just for him. He is the picture of perfect relaxation, a Sleeping Beauty almost, but for the alert set of his head, the light in those green, green eyes of his. "My brother?" Loki smiles. "He will accept."

Doom is amused. "You tried to kill him the last time you saw him." He raises a hand, before Loki can speak. "Spare me the quibbling details, Loki. My point remains a valid one."

Those details: Loki's people are not quite immortal, but they are close. They measure their lifespans in millennia, instead of the years most humans use. - Further, there is something about golden apples... Once Loki has cozened his way back into the hearts of his adoptive family, Doom looks forward to experimenting on some of these apples. – ...It was not the _last_ time, but _one of the last times_ they met, that Loki tried to kill Thor. Since then there has been war, an unfortunate defeat for his betrothed. Interestingly enough, Odin chose to punish Loki by sealing his magical powers, and banishing him to earth. One wonders why he thinks this would stop someone from plotting mischief.

Loki laughs shortly. "Your _point_ is about to be disproven." He gestures toward the viewing screen, and the blond caped figure who has just appeared in the middle of Tony Stark's kitchen.

This screen is, in its way, a gift from Doom's betrothed. Not that Loki _gave_ it himself (His command of Earth technology is still sadly lacking), but it was his earlier attack that gave Doom the opportunity to have it installed. There were workers who came to Stark's penthouse to repair the damage there. One left more than was agreed upon. Placing the camera in the label on Stark's whiskey decanter ensures it will always be out, and in a good location for surveillance.

Onscreen, the blond stomps over to the table. "My brother sent this," he says. "Look."

Doom's point, while not disproven, is in considerable jeopardy at the moment. He is untroubled. A wedding should have family in attendance, someone to share the enjoyment of the happy bride and groom. It is sad that Doom himself has so few relatives. He has sent an invitation to his god-daughter Valeria (care, unfortunately, of her egregious birth-parents), but he has yet to hear back of her acceptance.

"Your brother," Doom comments, "is a man of few words."

"My _brother_ is a man of great muscle and little wit." Loki's body stiffens. His voice grows bitter, as it always does when he speaks of his family. The inevitable resentment of a child, born among inferiors, and judged all his life by their flawed standards. "He clings to the mistaken notion that Asgard will ever accept a Frost Giant's unwanted spawn, except as a conqueror."

Someone should touch him, and soothe the tension away from his body. He is beautiful like this, a coiled snake, ready to strike without warning, but he is more beautiful when he relaxes. Doom signals for a robot. "Massage my betrothed's shoulders."

"It is unnecessary." Slightly, perceptibly, Loki relaxes.

"The Jotun thing, yes." Bereft of his former task, the servant still stands waiting. Doom sends him for refreshment. "It is not birth that makes a family," he tells his consort, "but likeness of mind. Your true family is here with me."

Onscreen, the lumpish Thor is eating: A plateful of greasy fried food that makes Doom's arteries harden just looking at it, which the super soldier, Rogers, has cooked for him. "Father's punishment was to bind my brother's magic." –

"His mouth is full." Loki points. "There is egg in his beard." Loki pays all too much attention to the _physicality_ of this blond brother of his. –

"He wears bracelets of dwarfish make, infused with magic none can reverse but our father."

None so far. Doom has not yet given up trying.

"He banished Loki to Midgard until he will show signs of repentance."

Speaking of reasons for optimism: Is there anyone who can feign repentance more effectively than Doom's betrothed?

"A-aaand apparently while he's been here, he's met up with Doom." Stark's voice, from behind his computer screen. "Everyone's favorite extraterrestrial magic-villain, now together at last with our favorite maniacal dictator here on Earth. Can it be true? Oh yes, ladies and gentlemen!"

"The one that Natasha was telling me about?" It is the super-soldier, Rogers. Doom has yet to meet him face-to-face. He looks forward to it. The man is entertaining in his naivety. "The one with his own country?"

"Yeah." Short answer from Stark. A hand emerges from behind the computer screen. "More coffee here?" There is a pause, while Rogers hands him some. Then follows a distasteful slurping sound. Then, "you know things have changed since the 40's, Steve. Coffee's not rationed any more, you're allowed to put in enough so you can actually taste it. I was there," Stark says. "In Latveria. It's true what they say about fascists making the trains run on time.

_Trains_, ha. It demeans the solar-powered high-speed rail system Doom has just finished installing to refer to it thus, the way one might describe a child's set of Thomas the Tank Engines.

Banner... – Oh yes, he's there. Not looking green and forceful at the moment, unfortunately, but just his rumpled, unassuming human self. – Banner nods. "I've been there too. Doom er... He ah, _likes_ the Other Guy. His power you know." Vague gesture. "What he can do with it. Are you going, Thor?" –

Stage-whisper, Doom to Loki: "I still say he won't."

And Loki's returning laugh: Sharp steel and finest silk, the rippling sound of cold water, trapped under winter's ice. "If your judgment were better, you'd rule this benighted realm by now, Victor. Listen."

Stalwart-brother says, "I must. Loki is my brother." –

"What will be annoying, is if the rest of them come too..." Doom stops to look over at his consort, who has tensed again. "You must learn some detachment, Loki. Not everything is a personal vendetta."

It is like asking water to run upstream, like asking birds not to fly, or serpents not to bite. Loki is still very young in terms of his race's lifespan. His emotions possess him. Often, he is a child to deal with, but Doom is patient. He has found a Being who might possibly have the potential of being an equal. He is willing to wait while he matures. –

"Fine, you go." Stark's voice. "I've been to Latveria before. It sucks. Besides, Doom's a tech-thief. He reverse-engineered my suit the last time, and after that his Doom-bots had all my best weapons."

The Doom-bots had _better versions_ of Stark's so-called "best weapons". They weren't all that good, and Doom has designed better ones since.

"I'm not going," says Banner. "I don't know about Doom and the Other Guy." He frowns. "I think he might still _trust_ him."

"I have to," says Thor. "My friends, I would appreciate if you came with me." -

Doom looks at Loki. "I should have just kidnapped the brother."

"I want him not!" The inevitable objection.

"This love-hate thing you have going with your brother," Doom says, "grows quite tiresome. Can't you get past personal emotions long enough to think strategically? Thor is useful. He will take us back to Asgard by the Tesseract's power. What possible use is it to us to have the others here too? It's bad enough I can't have Valeria Richards here unless I give house room to her parents. The Avengers will be constantly in our way, poking their noses where they don't belong..."

"It was you who said, Victor..." Loki smiles. "A wedding is not the same without guests. Shhh." He points to the screen.

The super-soldier speaks: "Fury's going to want us all to go when he hears about this." –

"The half-blind one with the heli-carrier?" Loki snorts. "I had forgotten he pulls the others' strings." –

"He'll want to know what Doom and Loki are up to."

Fury is an excuse. It is Rogers who wants to know what they're up to. Soon he will infect the others with his curiosity.

There is silence, punctuated only by the slurping noises of Stark drinking coffee. Loki leans back against the sofa. Idly, he plays with Odin's bracelets.

Finally, "we ought to go." Onscreen, the other Avengers look up at Banner's words. "We owe it to Thor, don't we?" he says. "He needs someone there to support him. – You saw how Loki was before. Should we really make him face that alone?" -

Loki smiles at Doom, his good humor restored. "This will be quite a wedding party."

It will indeed. Doom will have super-heroes underfoot constantly running about everyplace, not to mention the wedding preparations Loki has demanded. He cannot possibly contain himself for joy. "I will have to have more guest rooms furnished."

"Come Victor, don't be grumpy." Loki is off the sofa. He is over by Doom's throne, one hand caressing right where his mask comes together with his armor. Almost, Doom shudders. The touch of flesh against almost-flesh is ...disturbing. Loki's smile widens. "This will be a wedding to be remembered for ages, and all the more for the presence of my _dear brother's_ friends. I didn't get nearly enough time to play with them the last time," he says. "Especially the one with the suit like yours... – What is his name, Victor?"

"Tony Stark." Under his mask, Doom smiles as well. There will, after all, be a few compensations to the presence of these new guests. Perhaps Stark has new improvements to the Iron Man suit that he would like to share.


	3. Half the Superheroes in New York

Steve's been to Europe. He saw Germany under the Nazis, and Russia under Stalin. Dr. Doom doesn't operate like any fascist dictator he's seen before. They were trying to take over the world every chance they got too, but they were out-and-out _enemies_. There was a war, a hot one with Hitler, and a cold one, that the US won, with Russia. Doom keeps an Embassy in downtown New York. Everyone pretends they're friends and everything's all hunky-dory between the US and Latveria. But then it gets even more complicated. Latveria doesn't allow tourists. They have a full-on terminal at La Guardia, but no planes run their except for Doom's private one.

And that's what he and the others are going to be taking on this trip. He asked Tony if he didn't want to take the Iron Man suit, but all he got was more grumbles about "that tech-thief Doom". Tony had to be persuaded just to take an old suit. He said with Hulk going, they weren't going to need any other protection. It took Fury yelling at him before he admitted that it wasn't going to work for him just to stand next to Bruce all the time in case of attack.

Actually, it's not just him, Bruce and Steve that are going to Latveria with Thor. Half the super-heroes in New York are going to be there, apparently. "The Fantastic Four?" Steve can't help snickering a little. "And Marvel Girl?"

She's the one that was really invited, apparently. "My daughter Valeria," Reed Richards tells Steve at the terminal while they're waiting for Doom's plane to arrive. "Victor helped Susan when she was born. – He's quite skilled, actually. – After that, there was a bond." He shrugs flexibly. "I honestly thought it was the only bond I'd ever see Victor form with anyone."

"This wedding really took us by surprise." Susan Richards comes up, munching trail mix out of a Ziploc bag. "Loki: He's the one with the alien army, right? Reed and I were out of the country at the time."

"The same..." Steve stops, as he sees Ben Grimm nearing, and waits for him to enter the terminal.

"Goddamn airport store prices." Grimm's got the Richards' two children in tow. "No magazines for you," he hears him telling fourteen-year old Franklin. "Not at twice the frikken cover price. You can have some of your sister's candy, though."

"Not me," Steve hears the boy say. "You know they're going to feed us on the plane."

Steve looks at his mother. "You're not worried the food will be poisoned? Doom's your arch-enemy, right?"

Susan smiles. "It won't be. We're guests, remember?"

"Victor's a man of honor," Reed says, "in his own way." He points at the window. "Isn't that the plane?"

Air Latveria is one big gold plane with a "D" on the side. Inside, it looks like some kind of weird combination of a business office and a throne room. There's a big gold chair, which has got to be where Doom usually sits, and a bunch of folding chairs set up for everyone else.

"Lord Doom sends his apologies for the lack of proper seating," says the pretty stewardess in the peasant costume. "This is his private plane. Latveria's treaty with your country does not allow for tourism."

The chairs have been bolted to the ground in case of turbulence. There are also TV trays that have also been bolted. The staff covers these with linen tablecloths with monogrammed "D"s on them, and serves them food on heavy golden plates: Roast meat, and fresh bread, and goblets of sticky, sweetish wine.

"Mead?"

Thor nods, and drinks appreciatively. "Very good mead."

"And the meat's probably boar." Tony tastes it. "You know I don't really like boar."

Steve doesn't either, but there are plenty of other things to choose from, albeit all of them seem to have come out of a medieval banquet.

"And the music..." Bruce listens. "Isn't that Wagner?"

"Wotan's Monologue," Reed says. "From the second act of 'Die Walkure'."

"Asgardian food, Asgardian music." Johnny Storm laughs. "Sounds like someone's trying to impress his new brother-in-law."

Better that than trying to kill him, Steve thinks. ...Although of course, the one might lead to the other. He takes some fish, which doesn't taste too weirdly medieval, and skips the mead for ale, which is also being offered. "Why do you think he's doing this?"

"Who, Victor?" "Who, Loki?" Reed and Tony answer at the same time.

Steve shrugs. Both of them, he means. There's a plan here, because there's got to be, but why go to such lengths on the background details?

"Somehow, it's going to be revenge on Thor." Tony says. "Loki hates him. Remember how he tried to kill him that first time?"

"Or Doom wants revenge on you?" Steve looks at Reed and Susan.

"Doom always wants revenge on Reed and Susie," Grimm says. "Or he wants them to get him stuff. He doesn't usually use a whole big elaborate deal like this to get what he wants."

"It could be love," Reed says, which earns a snort from Johnny. "No, seriously. Victor is human, you know."

Susan shakes her head. "Victor's only human because he hasn't figured out a way not to be yet. He and Loki are plotting something, but I don't think it includes any of us. I don't think he's figured out a way of destroying this many super-heroes all at one time yet."

"And meanwhile we're going to go, and we're going to be nice..." Johnny snorts again, and Reed glares. "We're _going to be nice_, I said, and we'll find out all we can while we're there. Whatever Victor and Loki have in mind, we'll want to be ready to stop it."

Outside the window, Steve sees land rushing up through the clouds. "I think we're there."

They left from La Guardia. They arrive at a tiny, old-school airport, a mile or two from Doom's castle. Standard Eastern European scenery is all around, maybe a little greener than what he saw during the War. Doom's sent an open black touring car for them, the kind of thing Hitler would have liked, only even he would probably have drawn the line at the big gold monogram on the side.

"Lord Doom has reserved a wing at Schloss Doomsberg for the use of his guests," Schloss Doomsberg proves to be a castle right out of Dracula. Peasant-costumed retainers unfurl a red carpet and then stand out of the way to let them pass. At the top of the steps, Steve sees a green-cloaked figure, sunlight glinting off the armor covering his body.

"You should be honored that Lord Doom greets you in person," their driver says.

Steve's not exactly sure who else would do it. One of the peasants maybe? He gets out of the car and stretches. – Super soldier serum doesn't keep a guy's muscles from stiffening up. – Before he he can start toward the stairs, little Valeria runs past him.

"Uncle Doom!" She sounds excited. "Mama says you're getting married?"

It looks weird for Doom to kneel and meet her eyes. "I look forward to introducing you to your Uncle Loki." He stands, then looks past her to the rest of them. Then he comes down the stairs and greets them at the bottom.

"Susan." Doom's arms are folded, but he looks reasonably pleasant. "You did well to bring the girl. – And Grimm," – He turns. – "You're still alive are you?"

"No thanks to you," Steve hears Grimm mutter.

"Oh, and Richards." Whatever pleasantness there was in Doom's voice goes away. "You are not planning to stand in my way this time?"

Reed puts out his hand. When Doom doesn't move to take it, he pulls it back with a cough. "Everyone should have a chance at happiness, Victor."

This time it's Doom that Steve hears mutter: "That's never stopped you before." Doom turns toward The Avengers. "Mr. Rogers? I've been looking forward to meeting you. And Stark. Prepared to dazzle the world at the next Expo?"

"Only the invited guests." Stark puts out a hand too, only to have Doom hold back. There's a pattern here, Steve thinks. "That doesn't usually include super-villains."

"You flatter me," Doom murmurs. He points up the stairs. "Well, my guests, why don't you go inside? I am sure Loki would like to see you. As for me, I will follow after I have spoken with my brother-in-law."


	4. Dinner at Doom's Place

The next time any of them see Thor is at dinner, which is served in a big echo-y hall the size of an airplane hanger. Dr. Doom's got another of those gold chairs of his. He sits all the way down at one end of the table with Loki on one side, and Thor on the other. Everyone else is way down at the other end, as if he can't quite bring himself to admit that they're there. Thor looks confused. He keeps glancing down at the other end where they're all sitting like he wants to talk to them, then back at his brother and Doom like he knows he can't.

Loki, on the other hand, looks as happy as Steve's ever seen him. He's still thin and ghostly-pale like he was during the invasion, but he looks like he's had a meal in the past three days, for a change, and like he's had a good night's sleep as well. Thinking about him sleeping, reminds Steve of who Loki's probably been sleeping with, or is going to be sleeping with soon. It's a disturbing thought, like this is just any two men who have found love together, like it's Tony and Bruce, or Clint and Phil Coulson. Then he takes another look at Doom and the feeling goes. He's like a big suit of ancient armor, that somehow manages to still be dangerous. The Destroyer, Steve thinks. That big iron attacker-thing that Loki sent after Thor in New Mexico that Dr. Foster told him about: That's who Doom reminds him of.

For a giant dangerous suit of armor though, Doom still manages to look pretty happy. There's a sparkle to his eyes (which are the only parts of him visible through the mask he wears) when he looks over at Loki that's like saying "this is mine." And then there's a smug glint when he looks back at his guests, that's like saying, "and there's nothing you can do about it."

Tony looks up at them. "That would be cute, if it weren't so disturbing."

"Victor and Loki?" Susan Richards looks up from the plate, where she's cutting meat for her daughter Valeria (She's a genius who's mastered theoretical physics and differential calculus, but she's still just a five-year old girl). Susan smiles. "You realize they'd both hate you for saying that."

Tony grins. "Maybe I should say it louder."

"I'll say it!" Johnny Storm sits up higher in his seat. He raises his voice. "You know we were just saying you're awfully _cute_ with your new boyfriend there, Doomy!"

All it earns him though is a clanking snort. "Simple minds and their simple comments. Perhaps if you were in a relationship yourself, Storm, you would not find us so interesting." Doom looks back toward Thor and Loki. He was apparently in the middle of saying something to them.

"You know, we should probably keep quiet and listen." Grimm, who normally seems to eat as largely as Thor, looks like he's having trouble finding anything to eat this evening. He keeps pulling dishes toward him, then eying them and pushing them away again. Steve watches a tureen of soup slop as he shoves it away.

"You should try some," he tells him. "That's spicy fish soup. It's pretty good." He pulls a tray over. "Here, this is stuffed cabbage. It's just like Hungarian food," he says, which earns him his own snort from Doom, down at his end of the table.

"It is _better_ than Hungarian food. Latveria leads the world in its cuisine, as in all things." His voice changes, becomes pleasanter ...a little. "I see you learned something from your travels, Captain. You appreciate our European cuisine? You must try the blood sausage, a traditional Latverian recipe."

Steve hears a choking noise from Johnny. "I ...ah, ...Thanks.." He takes some. It's probably better not to refuse the food you're offered by tyrannical dictators. Then he slices off a bite. It's basically just salami, only not quite as chewy.

Now that he's started noticing his guests however, Doom seems inclined to continue. He looks down their way, not at anybody in particular, but at all of them, like they're an audience. "I was talking to my new brother-in-law about our plans for a wedding trip." -

A honeymoon. Doom and Loki are planning a honeymoon. That disturbing feeling starts to come back again. -

"We're planning a visit to Asgard. Loki naturally, wishes to introduce his new spouse to his family." Thor raises a hand. "I explained, Brother Victor..."

Doom just keeps on going. "It is an adoptive relationship of course, but family is family. One must cherish the relationships one has. I am sure my guests will agree."

"I'm happy to hear you say that, Victor," says Reed, who always seems to think the best of everyone. "But I'm a little surprised. You've never... Ah, I've never seen you..." His words die off, in the face of Doom's iron glare.

"How typical that you cannot see beyond your own conventional worldview, Richards. Because my ways are different from yours, does that mean I should spend my life alone?" He looks back at Thor. "I should not have tried to include your _friends_ in the conversation." A mailed hand touches Thor's arm. On his other side, Steve can see Loki leaning near as well. "We were talking about our visit to Asgard."

Grimm looks at Steve. "Reed was thinkin' about that girl and the armor. The one that was Doom's girlfriend, only he got a chance to use her soul to power his armor so he destroyed her. He doesn't care about love, that's just a lot of bullshit he's giving Thor."

"Of course it is." Susan leans in close on his other side. "Victor's never cared about anybody. You should have seen how many times Reed tried to make friends with him when they were in college, but he'd never give him the time of day. The question is, will your friend fall for it?"

"Thor will, Odin won't." Tony joins the conversation. He pulls a wine bottle close and refills his glass. "This stuff is good. Did you guys try it?" Then with a look at the head of the table, he lowers his voice. "I'd probably better keep my voice down. Apparently Doom likes it when you compliment the food."

"There, see?" Now Reed's talking with them too. "That proves he's got feelings." He coughs. "Kind of ...In his own way."

The meal goes on and on. First they're at the table forever while Doom talks with Loki and Thor. Then after that they move back to the Reception Room, and there's dessert wine and plates of pastries. Doom takes his favorite seat on his big golden throne. He and Loki take some of the pastries over there, and talk privately.

Now that he's not being watched, Thor finally comes over so the others can talk to him. He has a glass of the dessert wine. "In sooth, this is e'en better than the mead on the plane."

"It's Tokay," Steve says. "It's a traditional Hungarian wine." He puts a hand over Thor's glass. "You'd probably better not have any more."

Thor pulls himself up, as if to take offense. "I am Aesir..." He stops himself and looks at his brother and Doom. "You think I will be gulled into making a decision in my brother's favor, but it is not my decision to make."

Steve shakes his head. "I think you can find out more about what Doom and Loki are plotting than we can. As long as you keep a level head."

Thor looks at his brother, with Doom over by the throne. Steve looks too: Loki leans close to Doom, his hands on his shoulders, and for a moment he gets that disorienting feeling again, that this is just any couple planning their wedding. Then Thor looks away, and he does, and it passes. "My brother busies himself with his ...er... With his betrothed. I think not that he will spare another glance for me tonight. Come, let us drink my friends, I would have that bit of cheer to comfort me at this troubling time."


	5. In Vino, Veritas?

The blond oaf of a brother suggests drinking, and naturally his friends, Stark and the rest, agree. Wine is procured, more of the aged Tokay from Doom's personal cellar, and other things, brought Doom is not quite sure from where. Spiced rum is the sort of cloying, adolescent-girl kind of drink that would appeal to an immature mind such as Storm's. Surely there was none such anywhere in the castle? And yet here it is. As for the Swedish Fish-flavored vodka, that is unnatural beyond words. No one who values their health should even acknowledge such a drink, and yet, someone seems to have brought some with them. The drinking starts. Richards and his wife disappear to who-knows-where. To their _room_ no doubt, which Doom was obligated to prepare for them, if he would have Valeria's presence. The super-soldier, Rogers remains for only a while, before leaving with the Hulk's other self. After that, none are left but the drinkers.

"That is the conference table where you met with the U.N., is it not?" Loki points, seeming amused. "And those chairs..." They watch together, as the brawny brother drags one of Doom's thrones closer. Loki looks at him. "Victor, you need more chairs."

He does not. Men stand in Doom's presence.

After a while, Loki slips away. What he can possibly see in these wastes of castle-space, Doom cannot see. It is to them that he goes however, and after a while Doom gives up waiting for him, and goes upstairs.

The Master Suite is emptier feeling for his not being there, but Doom does not care. How many years after all, was he not alone and perfectly comfortable, before Loki came? It is weak men, Richards and the like, who are dependent on their fellows' company for their happiness. Doom has his plans to go over. There is the prototype for a next-generation Doom-bot that he has neglected sadly, since he began preparation for the wedding. There is also the ongoing task of researching his soon-to-be-father-in-law's Treasure Vault. Eventually, and only to keep his mind fresh for his work, Doom opens the page with the video feed, from the surveillance cameras in the Reception Room.

The party he finds, has moved to the other room. "You know I always thought you were just a big, self-obsessed asshole." Storm, from the looks of him, has nearly been taking a bath in the vodka and other beverages. He leans floppily on Loki's sofa, one hand on Stark's shoulder, and the other clutching a bottle.

"That's funny." Stark is chummy as well. "I always thought you were an annoying little pipsqueak"

Storm laughs. "I was right."

And Stark. "So was I."

Behind them, Doom sees Grimm, with a keg of ale from Doom's cellars, clasped in his rocky arms. He takes a gulp, passes it to Thor, who drinks as well, then holds it for Loki, who seems to be quite enjoying it.

"You have to come back with me." Thor's gaze is bleary.

"To Asgard..." Loki's speech is unclear. "That is not my home." This was their plan, was it not, to let Thor make the case for their trip to Asgard, while Loki pretends indifference? How much ale though, Doom wonders, will it take for an Asgardian to forget his plans? "I am Jo... I am Jotun." He slurs the words. "I w-would not return, even would All-Father have me."

"You must." Big, brawny arms, around the Trickster's alabaster throat.

"I won't."

Thor looks at him. "Why?"

By now, Doom watches just to see what will happen. Loki is still a new being to him; he does not yet know what effect the alcohol will have upon his resolve.

"Odin asks what I cannot give." Loki waves vaguely. "He would have me ren ...ah, _renounce_ my actions against the Jotnar, that I took, brother, only for him."

The Liesmith speaks. Doom did well not to doubt him.

"Repent, brother." Onscreen, Doom sees Thor lean close. He plants, incredibly, a kiss on Loki's cheek.

And Loki does not pull away. "Of what?" He cuddles soft as a cat in his brother's arms, while behind them, still visible, Grimm continues to gulp from the keg. "As soon you should repent of at ...of attacking Laufey. The Jotnar are monsters, they should die."

"Not this Jotun." This time Loki turns his head, just as Thor leans close. Their lips brush. _What is this that Doom is watching?_

The tab right next to it takes him back to the plans for his Doom-bot. It is still early, just midnight or a little later, and Doom has often worked the night through. Soon Loki will tire of ...of whatever he is doing down there. His return upstairs will doubtless be disruptive, after his having drunk so much. Best to do this work, which requires concentration, now, while he still can.

His hands move. Coding is entered. No sound in the Master Suite except his fingers on the keys and the faint creak-creak of his armor. Time goes by. How much time it is, Doom does not know. He does not care. Doom is above such petty concerns. Eventually, and only after he has polished designs for the lefthand lasers to maximal lethality, he goes to bed.

He sleeps. – Of course he sleeps, did you think he would do otherwise, because of one being's momentary absence? Doom's father was killed in front of him when he was still a child. His mother's soul was unjustly condemned to Hell. He worked for decades to engineer her release, only to have her spurn him when she returned. Think you that Doom's comfort depends on one who is really nothing more than an ally? Do not underestimate him. He sleeps.

When he wakes, Loki is there, curled against the warmth of Doom's body. His breath is a soft whisper, faintly alcohol-scented, his hair is a tickle against Doom's bare back. His skin ...smells of his infernal brother.

It is morning, or close enough. It will be light in a couple of hours at any rate. Doom descends to the kitchen, where a Doom-bot prepares coffee. He opens his laptop and reads the headlines: Mole-Man is not, unfortunately, making incursions in New York while the Fantastic Ones are away. Nor has Lehnsherr yet managed defeat of Professor Xavier. There are some typhoons forecast for the South Pacific, that may herald machinations by Namor. Some Governor in California or someplace, seeks "new ideas" for green energy generation, of which Doom has several. It is enough to keep his interest. And eventually morning comes and the others arise.


	6. These Kids and Their Technology

Talk around the breakfast table is that Thor spent the night in Ben Grimm's bed. – No wait, scratch that: Talk around the breakfast table in the_small_ dining room is that he spent the night there. As soon as the talk starts, Susan Richards takes both the kids into the kitchen, and who knows what they talk about there? There's also the _large_ dining room, the one where they had dinner the night before: Doom's already in there when Steve gets up, and Loki goes in soon afterward. Steve hears shouting coming out of there, but they could be talking about anything.

In the small dining room though, they're talking about Ben and Thor. "Listen, I don't remember none of it." – Ben's breakfast this morning is cup after cup of black coffee. Apparently being made of rock doesn't stop you from getting a hangover. – "Last thing I remember: Thor and Loki were talking to their dad: Thor said this was the chance they'd been waiting for, that Loki _belonged_ with his family in Asgard. Then Tony got some pictures of them hugging."

"Twitter, baby." - Tony winces. "Uggh, whoever invented Swedish Fish vodka should be _shot_. – We started getting hits as soon as it posted." He shakes his head (and winces again). "I don't remember much after that either. Maybe Johnny?"

Susan's younger brother is gulping pancakes like they went out of style. Alcohol, apparently, just burns off as soon as he drinks it. He looks up. "Maybe Johnny what?"

"Maybe you can solve the burning question of the day." Bruce's voice is dry. "Which apparently is, why did Thor wake up in Ben Grimm's bed this morning?

"Oh, that's easy." Johnny chomps another hunk of pancake. "I put him there. Loki helped."

Reed looks at him. "Why, Johnny? What could possibly have made you think that was a _good_ idea?"

"Well we were kind of drunk at the time," Johnny says through a mouthful of pancakes. "Plus he was really heavy; must be all the muscles from lifting his hammer..."

"It was a _joke_." The elegant voice coming from the doorway is Loki's, and immediately they all turn and look at him. He saunters over to the table. "What are these?" He just touches the plate of pancakes with one finger.

"They're our breakfast," Johnny's quick to say.

"They're pancakes," Reed says at the same time. "Susan made them. Won't you share some, Loki?"

"Interesting." Loki forks up several. "Tell me, mortal: Were they made _in_ a pan, or are there pans in them?" He nibbles one. "They are acceptable, as Midgardian foods go." He takes another bite.

"So tell me, if you don't mind my asking, Reindeer Games:" Tony looks at him, then away quickly at the sight of the food going into his mouth. "What was so funny about the thought of your brother in Ben's bed? Because to tell you the truth, I don't see the joke."

"Really?" Loki chews, swallows, and then favors Tony with a smirk. "You are the one mortal I thought would appreciate it. You have, at least, some sense of humor." He reaches out to trace the line of Tony's throat with one teasing finger, then cups his chin in his hand. My dear so-called 'brother's' bed was empty last night, Stark, and my own was scarcely more used. You dullards noticed, do you think Victor failed to do the same?" He smiles, then leans forward to brush a kiss across Tony's lips. "It is not well for a bridegroom to be too comfortable, right before the wedding."

"Slut," Steve hears Ben mutter. He's inclined to agree.

Tony, looking dazed, says, "You know I'm almost starting to feel sorry for Doom."

"So where's your brother now?" Reed asks.

Loki gives an elaborate shrug. "Am I my brother's keeper?" He laughs. "And I had my wish, he is being shouted at, either by Victor or by All-Father." He looks at the door. "If someone will open it?"

Reed reaches out one long arm and pulls it open. Sure enough, shouting voices can be heard.

Loki laughs some more. "Ha, even with his powers shackled, Laufeyson is in control."

Between them, Loki and Johnny finish the rest of the pancakes. Reed and Steve have already had all they want, and Bruce is more a yogurt-and-granola-for-breakfast kind of a guy. Tony and Ben, of course, don't want any. A little while after all the food's gone, right about when they're clearing their dishes into the kitchen, Thor stomps in. His shoulders are down and he looks chastened.

"My dear brother." Loki's penetrating whisper.

"So Thor..." Johnny looks up from the cup of coffee which he is currently dosing with cream and sugar. "Loki says someone was yelling at you. Was it Doom, or was it your dad?"

Thor nods. "My brother was ever perceptive. It appears that All-Father was not pleased when we contacted him last night." – He comes over to the table. "Is there more breakfast?" He sighs, when Steve shakes his head no. "Such is ever the way... – Why would Brother Victor have been yelling at me?"

Steve takes pity. "Come on to the kitchen with me, Thor. I'll make more pancakes. Only the kids are in there, you have to be careful what you talk about."

"No sex," comes Loki's penetrating voice. "Mention not the stallion Svaoilfari brother, and you value your life."

"The stallion who?" Tony looks up. "What's he not supposed to mention?"

"And you had best not go with them, Stark," Loki says. "I very much fear your entire life is inappropriate for children."

"Yes, but the horse?"

Loki leans close for another kiss. "Shh, I will tell you that story later."

It is at precisely this moment, that Doom walks in the door. His eyes go to Tony at once. "_Stark_, cease to touch what is not yours."He looks from him to Thor. "You will do me the courtesy of explaining your whereabouts last night, when your bed was not slept in."

"Thor is a guest, Victor." Loki is out of his seat and over next to his supposed fiance in the time it takes a man to blink. He leans close for a kiss. "Pray do not impose suspicion upon every small event he is involved in."

Doom, for his part, dodges just as Loki's lips are about to touch. "You are well called, Trickster God. Were you with this perfidious brother of yours last night?"

"I was." Loki smiles. "And there are pictures. – If I may, Stark?"

Tony's not the only one to blink, as a hand with black-painted nails snakes out and takes the Stark-phone right out of his hands. Loki taps the screen. "Behold."

Doom moves close. Steve hears him catch his breath as he looks at the pictures, and he can swear he sees his iron mask move into a frown. Loki keeps tapping the touchscreen, showing picture after picture. "These are the selfies," Steve hears him say. Then silence.

And then Doom says, "Stark Enterprises?"

"What?"

"The Twitter feed." Doom grabs the phone and swings around to confront Tony. "Was it your clever idea, Stark, to use your company to make Doom a laughingstock before the whole world?"

"Chill, Doom-y." Johnny grabs the phone. "It's not like you weren't already... Oh ...fuck." He shoves the phone at Tony. "Seriously dude? You uploaded the pics to your company's main feed?" The phone starts ringing. "Here," he says. "It's for you. Er, who's Pepper Potts?"


End file.
